For the Child Who Hits or Throws When It Goes Off

Four lines you can say out loud tonight. Word for word. Free to save.

What to say

1. Screens off. Hands stay on your own body, even when you’re furious.

2. Hitting comes out when the words are too big to get out any other way.

3. I step one arm away from you and keep my hands open and low where you can see them.

4. When your hands are calm, you come and sit next to me and we pick what happens next.

When to use it

This is for the moment it actually goes wrong — not the calm version you rehearse in the car. Pick one line. Say it once. Then stop talking and wait three seconds. If they push back, repeat the same line, not a new one. Say the same thing for five nights before you decide it doesn't work.